Self-Sabotage & Shadow Work

Last week I went to my energy healer for a session.  My lower back was aching for a few weeks and there’s nothing like a good clean energy sweep from a guided angel healer on earth.  Before we begin we always talk to see where I need the most help. If I have any aches or pains, what goals I’m working on, any stresses or issues.  Basically for the past while I’ve been pretty happy.  I told her some ideas I had for a new venture and that I feel funny because I’m so used to “working” on myself I feel lazy or that I should be “doing something” for my better good all the time.  She asked me the question “Where’s that coming from? Is it a subconscious message?” I sat and thought about it. It was that old nagging “You’re not good enough!” tape.  That good old sabotage message that was branded in my brain as a child.

The past few weeks I’ve been shying away from just bursting forth with my new artsy idea for the same reason.  You know, you get the original rush of a super fabulous idea, then those self doubting words creep in.  What if it’s dumb?  What if I suck at it?  What if no one likes my work? And the list goes on.  Once she validated what I’ve been doing the past couple of weeks, we decided to focus the session on ridding those subconscious thoughts.  That’s the beauty of healing touch.  More often than not we have things that hinder us and cause us so many road blocks that we are consciously not aware of.  Having a healer draw them out helps us to cleans ourselves of these subconscious hindrances.

My Inner Child: A Friend Forever     Needless to say, after my session I felt wonderful and relaxed.  I was stress free and was ready to go.  There’s a few more things I’m working towards on an intuitive level and those are sharpening with time and practice.  I’ve made a commitment to myself to go see my angel friend every month if possible to keep up with my spiritual regiment.  Plus she’s just a really great person that I’ve known for over twenty years now.

We all have a story, and more often than not it’s not a pleasant one.  It’s so important to recognize the need to acknowledge the effect that our past has on our present decisions, choices and our present living situations.  If you continue to live in a place where you are being controlled by your inner wounds, you will never be fully happy or fulfilled with whatever you chose to do.  There will always be that empty place that you continually are compelled to fill.  Taking responsibility for your wounds and healing them is essential for a fulfilling life and living your life to it’s fullest.  Everyone on a spiritual journey on this planet has to do shadow work.  If we don’t heal our inner child or shadow self, we project that part of ourselves on others, our children and family.  Here are some great quotes and an article that will get you thinking on the importance of shadow work.  It is the hardest and most rewarding thing that we can do for ourselves and our descendants.  It’s never too late to start and with any kind of self growth there is always groups, counselled and healers that are here to guide and support you on your road to healing and to provide continual support and maintenance.

How to befriend your shadow: Welcoming your unloved side


Our shadow-self remains the hidden, disruptive element that does not want to be known. Denial runs deep because the shadow does not want to be exposed. Its nature is to remain outside of our awareness. Therefore, we need to learn how to catch a glimpse of it when it appears. Then we can connect with it, work with it, and eventually reduce its power to unconsciously sabotage us.

The aim of meeting the shadow is to develop an ongoing relationship with it. A right relationship with the shadow offers us the opportunity to uncover our buried potentials. Shadow-work requires perseverance, patience, discernment, and compassion. Meeting the shadow calls for slowing the pace of life, listening to the body’s cues, and allowing ourselves time to be alone in order to digest the hidden messages from the disconnected parts of our self. It requires that we simultaneously embrace both the world of light and the world of darkness. British Jungian analyst Liz Greene points to the paradoxical nature of the shadow as both the container of darkness and the beacon pointing toward light. “The shadow is both the awful thing that needs redemption, and the suffering redeemer who can provide it.” Through shadow-work we can:

  • alter our self-sabotaging behaviors
  • achieve a more genuine self-acceptance based on a more complete knowledge of whom we are
  • defuse the negative emotions that erupt unexpectedly in our daily lives
  • feel more free of guilt and shame associated with our negative feelings and actions
  • recognize the projections that color our opinions of others
  • heal our relationships through more honest self-examination and direct communication
  • open ourselves to our natural talents and creativity that are buried

Some of the specific tools used for accessing the unconscious include drawing, writing, movement, dream journaling, ritual, and active imagination. Working with a therapist who is familiar with shadow-work can often make the difference between simply gaining insight into the shadow and actually being able to explore it in depth and integrate it in healthy ways.

Facing the Shadow: Starting Sexual and Relationship RecoveryFamily Secrets: The Path from Shame to Healing

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I am the proud owner of Smudge Metaphysical. The products that I create support my local women's shelter Hiatus House. I teach others how to achieve their goals and heal themselves via magickal practice, energy manipulation and spirit work. I'm a proud recipient of a prestigious Biz-X Award for "Best Little Retail Store 2015". I encourage personal power through your unique expression of self and spirit, and have created a safe space for others to develop their magickal skills via Smudge Metaphysical.

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